04.14.05
Somehow, I ended up watching a marathon of PoweR Girls on VH-1.
This is a reality-show about the PR firm that Lizzie Grubman runs, following her activities, and the activities of the various little cutie pies that work for her. It's fairly engrossing, to be honest.
What amazes me the most about it though, is that somehow -- 4 years after she was on trial for 26 counts, including DWI and vehicular assault for backing into a crowd outside of a nightclub, and injuring 16 people before driving off, she's a 34 year-old golden girl with an MTV reality show.
Instead, she pleads guilty to reduced charges of third-degree assault and leaving the scene of an accident causing serious bodily injuries, and then serves 38 days of a 60-day sentence (she got time off for good behavior).
That's like 8 years of prison time she managed to dodge. Man, that is some seriously fucking great PR spin, my friends.
And now she's got her very own television show, and a producer title to boot.
It's a clever deal: get in with the hip young kids using girly eyecandy underlings and big names like Jay-Z, and maybe you can make people forget just why you got so famous in the first place.
Maybe there's hope for Martha Stewart yet!
I hear she's going to be heading up her own reality-ish show, The Apprentice: Martha Stewart*.
I mean, that has totally got to trump** an obstruction of justice conviction.
Now she just needs to score some hotties to do her bidding on camera, get a fake tan and some hip threads (goodbye Chico's!), and she too could be a golden girl***!
*She's also going to be starring in her very own syndicated hour-long daytime show, with more of a hybrid talkshow-Emeril Live vibe.
**No relation to Donald, of course. Lookit me! I'm a walking, talking bad-pun generator, folks!
***Yes, the obvious joke can be made that she's the appropriate age to actually be a cast member of The Golden Girls, were it still around. However, I was actually intending to make the comparison to Miss Grubman's star turnaround.
What's in your head?