08.12.03
I went to the dentist's office tonight for a check-up/cleaning. I think she was supposed to take bitewings too, but she didn't, and I wasn't really in the mood to care all that much. If the dentist can't communicate to his underlings that they need to do their job in its entirety before he slips out the side door to go watch a ballgame, then so be it.
My teeth are now all sparkly and smooth, and my gums are only bleeding in a few small places where I was violently gouged with the scraping tool.
Overall, I have to say that this trip was remarkably novel.
I had to hold the suction thing for her, to use at my discretion, which I did just fine.
I learned that those weird water-blistery things I sometimes get in my mouth that pop and then all the skin peels off and leaves a raw spot that heals up quickly is actually a virus like a cold sore. Now I know that I'm a walking non-specific weird virus incubator -- nothing STD or anything, just skin-based*.
I learned that there now exists some sort of ultrasonic cleaning tool that emits the precise frequency necessary to make me believe my ears are bleeding when applied to a rear molar. The hygenist said it was something like dogs and dog whistles, but more like people and dental appliances.
I got kudos for being a toothpick afficionado. Apparently I do as good a job compulsively picking as I would flossing.
And I was given some interesting oral hygenic paraphernalia -- a new, high quality toothbrush, sensitive toothpaste, whitening toothpaste, toothpicks that come in a tear-off matchbook-type pack, and a mini toothbrush thing for cleaning betwixt teeth!
DENTAL BOOTY!
*Don't forget the Pityriasis rosea. That was a weird virus thing too.
What's in your head?