askpixie.

08.21.04

(Happy Birthday, Randy McBride!)

Hi,

My name is Laura and I was asked by Driver to talk to you about the benefits of the product that I am using.

I have been married for over 12 years now and lately, like all marriage's, we have become more and more distant from each other.  We have not been intimate in over 6 months.  Well about a month ago, I came across an email that was selling these products that was guaranteed to help with our problem. I was hesistant at first, but decided to go ahead and try it anyway. To my surprise, it worked exactly as they said.

It's not the miracle that will save a marriage but it will definatlely help put the spark back into the relationship. I am trying to help as many people as I can to find the happiness that once was. You should definately check it out and tell me what you think.

http://www.herbalo.XXX/en/4/

Just get back to me and tell me if I was able to help you with this.

Thanks,

Haley Elkins

spandrel

cos

phenylalanine

drexel carib minuscule bettor phenomenon psych platitude caviness devolve actaeon price aggressor joystick baneful absolve . serpens hoff gmt proffer tellurium circuitry univalent cauliflower church finessing titan stultify archetypical wintry yokuts basketball dock klystron degree requisition immense philology chat duress aldrich tilde . cynic sulfonamide bristol geigy touchstone bater coffer chat catatonia concept freedmen deforest balsa braille

I'm confused, is your name Laura or Haley Elkins?

And I don't think I know anyone named Driver. I mean, you don't forget a name like that, do you?

I also see that you are peddling generic Cialis and Viagra. Those are for men, are they not? I've heard that the ladies can use viagra to make things a little more enjoyable, but I doubt that it would cure your problem.

So, how did your hubby react to you wanting to give him drugs to get it up?

I'm not a man, but if my relationship was fizzling after 12 years, and my wife came up to me and said, "Honey, I got you some generic Viagra!" I'd be a little insulted.

Maybe it isn't that I can't get it up.

Maybe it's the fact that the little missus has packed on 47 pounds since we tied the knot, and she traded in the designer duds for slobby sweats and a t-shirt.

Maybe it's because I work hard to pay our bills and keep a roof over our head, and she spends all day at home in front of the television, running up credit card charges while she buys a bunch of crap from the Home Shopping Network.

Maybe it's because I realized that I'm gay, and am planning on divorcing her fat ass and embracing the queer lifestyle.

And I'm not going to even get into the random spew that you added to the bottom of your email.

You can't spell "definitely,", but you can spell miniscule, cauliflower, braille and sulfonamide?

Whatever.

-- pixie

 

Yesterday & Tomorrow.

do you have a question for askpixie? mail: askpixie(at)pixiemartin(dot)com

(if you want to know about some form of thermal relaxing, click here.)

If pixie can't help, you're screwed.™