09.26.01
I'm getting burnt out on academia.
Don't get me wrong, it isn't that I don't like bettering myself, or learning new things, or at least things that I probably have learned before and then promptly forgotten once the class was over.
However, finding the will and motivation to go to class is getting more difficult by the day.
Frequently, my going to class just fills the teacher with all these unrealistic expectations.
Sure, I will remember that the Geometric and Orientalistic movements preceded the Archaic period in Greek art history, at least until the midterm is over, or I am no longer in need of this information, which I will then promptly forget.
The teacher gets this warm tingly feeling from giving me an "a", but I could have gotten the "a" without attending a single lecture, and most likely would be unable to achieve a "b" grade on the same test, one year later. S/he thinks s/he's filling me with knowledge, and all I'm doing in class is thinking about how Angel's going to start in 15 minutes, and how I hope I have some cookies left in the cupboard at home.
And besides, a great deal of the time, I would much rather be sleeping.
Pre-class motivational conversations with myself generally run along the lines of, "Okay, lazy ass, get your kiester off to class or you'll never find a parking space."
'But if I go to class, she'll expect me to learn something!'
"Suck it up, whiner."
*throws self on bed and kicks at the air futilely*
*finds pants*
'Fine, I'll go, but I'm not going to enjoy it.'
"No one ever said Art History was fun, buttercup. Don't forget your notebook."
